For anyone who is not familiar with the word "Jate" it stands for the relationship between Jack and Kate. A "Jater" is a reference to someone who feels Jack and Kate should be together. A "Skater" would be a fan of the Sawyer/Kate relationship. I am neither a Skater nor a Jater, just for the record. I don't even find the triangle itself to be an interesting storyline. But since "Jate" appears so prominently in "Something Nice Back Home," I gave it some more thought. I have come to the conclusion that Jack and Kate should not be together. At all.
Kate is not right for Jack. Jack needs a woman who is content to be controlled, a woman who will never ever have any hobbies, friends, or interests that might involve anyone that isn't Jack. So, perhaps that is an exaggeration. But Jack is a powderkeg of paranoia and obsession. Kate is someone for whom lying is a default setting. In fact, between the both of them, their whole existence in the future is predicated on lies and secrets. This turn to controlling, abusive behavior we are seeing with Jack was inevitable. Speaking of which, this is why Jack is not right for Kate. Just being around Jack makes her a weepy, apologetic mess. What happened to the Kate Austen who knew a controlling jerk when she saw one and knew how to dispatch of same? Seeing her pleading with him to just trust her was not how I thought Kate would deal with such treatment. Also, other than apparently losing her backbone, Kate Of The Future is doing very well. She is no longer on the run, she has taken on the stabilizing responsibility of "motherhood" and she is fabulously wealthy. There is nothing there for Jack to fix.
So if these two are not right for each other, who is? Sawyer and Juliet? Maybe. I certainly can make an argument for Sawyer being more suitable for Kate based on their life experiences. They both understand what it is like to be on the run, to have their loved ones hurt, and to have killed someone. In the end, however, I would give it to Sawyer just because he seems to have a lot more respect for Kate's independent spirit. Juliet can relate to Jack professionally, at least in the sense of compulsively needing to fix things. A better indicator of her suitability would be her strength in dealing with an obsessive admirer. I believe that if it was Juliet in that living room of the future and Jack was trying to pull that manipulative act on her, she would stand up to him with a few choice words that would put him straight and the situation would be over.
To be truthful, I haven't really decided how I feel about Kate and Sawyer/Jack and Juliet. The other half of the "love quadrangle" is not really why I think Jack and Kate are unsuitable. Just about the biggest reason I feel this way has to do with Matthew Fox and Evangeline Lilly. Deep, deep down, I feel there is just no chemistry between these actors. Every time they interact romantically I just don't see any sparks. They just give off such a brother/sister vibe that anytime they kiss I get a tad uncomfortable. Let's compare Jack and Kate in the hallway in "Something Nice Back Home" and Kate and Sawyer in the polar bear cage in "I Do." It could just be the exotic locale, or the danger that they will be caught, or even just better writing, but the scene in the cage was much more exciting and downright steamy. Jack and Kate canoodling in their jammies, not so much. Again, I get that the dramatic level of each of these scenes were vastly different, but if the show wants me to care about these two as a couple, it's not doing a very good job of convincing me that they are believably in love with each other.
I would also like to share one more thought I had about this relationship. Despite how I feel about them, the show has given us a Jack/Kate engagement after they get off the island, even if it is short-lived. For what it's worth, I really feel like Jack proposed more so to test Hurley's theory that things are just a bit too perfect than as a romantic gesture. Basically the girl of his dreams said two things that would make him happy, and that are almost too good to be true: that he makes a good Dad (which makes him better than the Dad he had) and that she will marry him. As he hugs her I felt like the look on his face was indicative of the thought that Hurley may be on to something. And of course, if this is the case, it would figure that Jack would find a way to ruin heaven.
In the end, I am not really rooting for any particular couple to get together. I am hoping for Jack and Kate to get themselves together. Jack especially needs to battle quite a few doubts and addictions, and work on his inability to trust. Kate, for as long as she is to be his "mother", has to put Aaron ahead of other men and make her choices based on what is best for him. But no matter what, I hope they stay far, far away from each other's bedrooms.
For anyone who is not familiar with the word "Jate" it stands for the relationship between Jack and Kate. A "Jater" is a reference to someone who feels Jack and Kate should be together. A "Skater" would be a fan of the Sawyer/Kate relationship. I am neither a Skater nor a Jater, just for the record. I don't even find the triangle itself to be an interesting storyline. But since "Jate" appears so prominently in "Something Nice Back Home," I gave it some more thought. I have come to the conclusion that Jack and Kate should not be together. At all.
That is one of the best analysis I have seen of the chemistry free, somewhat abusive dynamics of the Kate and Jack relationship. I fact, after SNBH, I did some research on the characteristics present in an abusive relationship since I have never enjoyed the way Jack treats Kate or the way Kate allows him to. How many of these behaviors have we seen Jack exhibit over the past four seasons?
Signs of an Abusive Personality:
*Quick involvement
Many abused women dated or knew their abuser less than six months before they became engaged or began living together. He needs someone desperately and pressures you to commit to him. Unused to men's wanting commitment, many women believe that this is a sign of his love.
*Unrealistic expectations
He is very dependent on you for all his needs, expects you to be the perfect wife, partner, mother, lover, friend. You are supposed to take care of everything emotionally as well as in the home.
*Rigid sex roles
He sees women as inferior to men, more stupid, unable to be a whole person without a relationship. He expects you to obey him, to serve him, to stay home.
*Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde
He has "sudden" changes in mood. One minute he's nice, the next minute he explodes. Anything can set him off on a rampage.
*Blames others for his problems
Almost anything that goes wrong in his life is someone else's fault. He makes mistakes and blames you. Almost anything that goes wrong is your fault.
*Blames others for his feelings
When he becomes angry and abusive it's because "You made me mad. You're hurting me by not doing what I ask. I can't help being angry."
*Poor or negative self-image
Research has found that abusers have lower self-esteem and masculinity scores than other men tested. One researcher calls this a "failed macho complex." These men appear to over-compensate for what they see as their failure to live up to the masculine stereotype.
*Hypersensitivity
He is easily insulted, or takes the slightest set-back as a personal attack. He rants and raves about the injustice of things that have happened to him - things that are really just part of living.
*Verbal abuse
He says cruel and hurtful things. He implies you are stupid and unable to function without him.
*Jealousy
He's constantly suspicious of any contact you have with other men at work or in social situations. He questions you about who you talk to, as his jealousy and possessiveness increase, he may call you frequently or drop by unexpectedly to check on you. He may refuse to let you work for fear you'll meet someone else, or even check your car mileage or ask friends to watch you.
*Controlling behavior
At first, he says he's just concerned about you. He may throw a tantrum if you are a few minutes late coming home from work or the store, or question you closely about where you went, who you spoke to.
*Isolation
He tries to cut you off from friends and family. He may restrict your use of the phone, limit your use of the car or prevent you from going to work or school.
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It makes me wonder if this is exactly what the writers are showing us. From the very beginning there have been hints of Jack’s darker side and TPTB have admitted that Jack may not be the hero, good guy we first thought.
Ok, it's already September, so I'm a little late to the party here.
I mildly disagreed with you on several points:
1. Jate's relationship has been prickly from the start, but since there was a strong connection and attraction there since their early days on the island, that proved to be their foundation or basis on what IS right about them, albeit both are dangerously teetering on a redemptive tightrope, where sometimes they revert to their old habits (Jack: paranoid, obsessive, Kate: selfish, manipulative) and that's continued as they 'play house', as you've noticed. In other words, their past is preventing from fully opening up or giving in to each other to be this happy couple. Whether they get over these issues, I guess we'll just see.
2. Jack proposed to Kate the night he returned from seeing Hurley at Santa Rosa. So, it wasn't that he saw Hurley, then planned on proposing. He bought the ring who knows when, saw Hurley, then proposed, unless there's some late-night jewelry store he made a quickie stop at. Just a chronological quibble here. You may be right generally in that Jack wanted to solidify his happiness by marrying Kate, amidst his doubt, but I don't think it was Hurley's words that pushed him there, but his own growing sense of guilt. Hurley's words just eeked the nail into the coffin.
3. I think one of the big reasons why TPTB has written Jate the way they have is to really test out how faith comes be acquired, in Locke's words - "It's never been easy" - and nothing really does come easy for the characters on this show. While Kate and Sawyer may share similar past life experiences, they don't see eye to eye towards their future. Jack and Kate do not share past life experiences, but they do share similar values and projections for themselves. If you didn't share the same ambitions such as marriage or children, then that relationship is what it is - sex. Booty calls. A warm body to feel comforted...which is exactly how TPTB have thus shown Skate's relationship. There's comfort and camaraderie, but their devotion to each other is sketchy. Jack and Kate share similar goals and values, but there's trust and devotion. It's just their wildly differing past demons that aren't making things easy for them...JMO.
Sorry for the long post. I didn't even realize I had this much to say...BAH. Lame triangle.
Hmm. I happen to be a mild Jater. I disagree about aJack needing a passive mate. I think he needs someone who will not let him get away with crap, and will stand strong. I think Kate can be strong, but sometimes she is wimpy and goes with the flow. I think the reason Jack is upset with her is because his first wife cheated on him and he was really hurt by it, so he is very afraid kate will do the same. He has very strong abandonment issues. (His wife, his father, his mother(?), whom we don't know about. While many strong men do like to be in control, I don't think that is the problem between Jack and Kate. I think it was poor of her to sneak behind Jack's back, in any case. She should have told him she was going to help Sawyer, and done it, but been honest about it. You don't keep things from your lover just because he won't like it!!!!!
Thanks for all the great comments, everyone!! A lot of great points have been made.
PPWI, about what you said about Kate not having it together, I think you are on to something... But I still think whatever she still needs fixed will not be fixed by Jack. lol. I think Crazy Stuff is right about this horrible relationship being there mainly for a catalyst to go back to the island, and I also think it has a lot to do with what Izzy said about it being an attempt to appease certain audience members.
Lakie, I'm sorry we don't agree, but I really hope they are not the couple of the future. I don't doubt they are in love, but sometimes love ain't enough. I know from experience that sometimes differences can be too great. Jack would have to do some serious changing to make me think he could be with anyone, much less Kate. Kate has some issues but for now (or at least the point in time we've seen so far) being with Jack just leaves her in a bad state.
On a side note, I want to apologize for the non-conformist font of my article. I swear I wrote the thing in Arial, and copy/pasted it like that into the article uploader thingie, yet it still posted as Times or something... I guess I'm still getting the hang of it. lol.
Great read!
I find myself a little bored with the romances on Lost. Too many other interesting things going on like what or who the heck is Jacob?
I just don't see anyway of the personalities of Jack and Kate ever making it in the long run, but the scenes with them wearing little or nothing made for good TV I guess.
TPTB have admitted they lost a chunk of the audience with the time travel whatever and I think I'm part of that audience. I miss Sawyer, I miss Charlie, I miss the Losties camp.
Wow, I couldn't agree less with this article. The facts presented in 4x10 only seemed to show me that Jack and Kate are the couple with the future, if they can work through their considerable issues. I sense a reality about their relationship. It's not just about who has sexual chemistry, it's about a deep soul-longing to love and understand someone who is so different than what you thought you wanted. Kate and Jack's struggle is what is making for their drama. The fact that their relationship's destiny seems to be tied to the future of the island is what makes it so satisfying.
Being a thirty something female you would think I would be a perfect demo for a Jater, however ther is just something missing when they are together. With Sawyer getting in touch with his noble side, (nothing new if you ask me, witness his gift to his daughter when he was in prison) I believe that he and Kate could make a go at it. I am shocked to admit that all through this episode I was thinking, "but what about Ben?" what is wrong with me? His character is just fascinating, in fact almost everyone on Lost is fascinating except Jack lately. It seems that the show is taking every opourtunity to showcase Jack's worst traits, without any of the balance previously displayed.
I am totally a Skater. I thought the relationship between Jack and Kate was very awkward. The chemistry is just not there.
I will partly base this on the fact that I dislike Kate more and more, but will buffer that bias by stating that I like Sawyer more than Jack and really don't want Kate to be with Sawyer.
SO it's a wash, therefore my original statement holds. Kate + Jack = Awkward & Unbelievable. Kate + Sawyer = Chemistry and jealousy on my part.
Kate belongs with Sawyer and I think they will reunite. Jack will die a heroic death.
the love triangle is the worst thing in the lost universe. boring.
Great Article Cayley. I agree with the most part of the article. I totally knew they were doomed from the start and trust issues and communication went sour that it was only a matter of time in the last episode that we were going to see a free falling/ spiraling decline in that relationship. I do not agree with the fact that Kate has gotten it together off the island. She will always be running from her past and maybe some call that getting it together but I see it as Kate doing what she does best running whether it's playing house with Jack and Aaron or finding creative ways to live an alternative lifestyle. (incognito) Her back story will reveal in the next Kate-centric episode what she is doing with her spare time off-island. I have a feeling it's more cloak 'n' dagger Ben type work. I could be wrong but playing housewife is more of a mark. She has to prove to me that she knows how to love someone. Instead of sleeping around her bed full of lies. Jack on the other hand is terrible in relationships. His drinking, drugs and Ghost Christian appearances are not helping. He seems to do better when he is getting Tat's and hiring Hookers. Sounds like most poloticians. Vote Jack 2008!!!
So, anyway well done and hopefully we figure out if the grass is greener on the other side (outside) the island. Cause right now the real world is looking like some peed on yellow colored lawn with a few piles of poo too!
PPWI
I agree. Kate and Sawyer together makes more sense and so does Jack and Juliet. But I don't care about the whole love triangle thing at all. I guess it's a love square by now or maybe even a love pentagon! I hope Kate dies so it never gets resolved because I don't want to hear everyone complaining when she chooses either Jack or Sawyer or ditches them both.
Good article but this was a good way to make all the storys of them having to go back to the island start.
Charlie got it in Jacks head, and now Kate will start to doubt the fact thats she is not the mother, she will know that Claire is still alive and she needs to take Aaron back to her.